5 Things I Learned This Weekend

1. I have finally figured out why my neck always hurts so badly after spending nights out with friends. It’s all the headbanging I’m doing. Seriously. The last few times I’ve had neckaches like the one I have now stemmed from when myself and a co-worker were pretending to be Kurt Cobain and Eddie Veder while drinking way too much sangria and when I played Rock Band with much abandon, pretending I was the lead singer from Paramore. This weekend, the culprit was the awesome** Rock Bar in downtown Kansas City, where girls with daddy issues go to dance on tables in their underwear and fuzzy boots. Apparently, I felt the need to rock out hardcore, and in order to do that, I needed to pull out some full blown headbanging.

Worst part, I wasn’t drunk, just trying to be funny, and now I feel like I need a neckbrace.

**awesome = absolutely awful, and even a little bit sad

2. Sometimes Trent is right, and that infuriates me. He told me that if I just stopped complaining and went to his work-event trivia with a smile on my face and a beer in my hand, I would have fun. I told him to shove it. But low and behold, he was right. I had fun. I even got to answer a Space Camp question (How many astronauts were sent up in each Gemini capsule? Um, 2. Duh. Who doesn’t know that?!), and now I owe him a certain, ahem, favor. Damnit.

3. When a person eats 30 pounds of cheese, a vat of salsa and a pot of guacamole, they will be incapacitated indefinitely. I’m still in recovery.

4. When a certain grandmother offers to take your kid to her house for three days, you inevitably will make plans of all the things you will do in her absense. Go to the movies! Finish painting the basement! Go out for dinner! Go bowling!

And in the end, you’ll find yourself on the couch for nine hours watching all three Lord of the Rings movies in order, stopping only to go to the bathroom or refill your popcorn and M&M’s. And your house will be messier than when the kid is there.

5. I could watch 30 Rock over and over again, and still laugh outloud. I swear, I never found Tracy Morgan funny until this show, and thought Alec Baldwin was pretty annoying. Now I find myself snickering as I watch clips in my office, and everyone I work with is wondering if I’m on drugs.