I know, there’s always an excuse, but this time I really do have a problem. Besides my normal problems. My computer officially thinks it is Sunday, January 11, 1970. Now, I think this is strange for several reasons. Number one, I was not alive in 1970. Number two, this website obviously did not exist in 1970. And number three, this computer did not exist in 1970. There is a possiblity that my computer is having a mid-life crisis and is trying to pretend it is a spry young laptop. Maybe some sort of anxiety now that the new Mac’s have come out making my dear Macaroni look like an old hag…
Whatever the reason, this strange series of events along with the fact that I’m in my third trimester now, which makes me unable to do about anything except for eat and sleep and bitch, I haven’t been updating as much as I should. Part of it is also that I don’t feel like I have much to say. Ahhh, the life of a human incubator. I was looking back at some older posts and realized I am much funnier when I have drunk stories to tell. I think I’m one of those people that isn’t to fun whist sober.
Oh yeah, and the Bearded Wonder turned off comments because of spammers. Sorry. They’ll be turned back on as soon as we can.
http://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.png00Meganhttp://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.pngMegan2006-03-23 20:28:002006-03-23 20:28:00Tale of the Non-Geek
Saturday night I had the most horrible, awful dream of all time. I think that part of it had to do with the fact that I went out to a bar last night in an attempt to “hang out” with a bunch of Trent’s guy friends and their significant others. For the first time in a long time, I almost wished I wasn’t pregnant. I was just so damn tired of feeling huge and hideous and boring. I felt how bitchy I was acting and just wished I could have a good time. I saw the girls dancing to the not-so-great band, just laughing and getting completely smashed.
Sucking down jacks and cokes quicker than I could down my sprite.
Then, last night, I had a dream that I lost the baby. And everything fell apart. I thought it was my fault for wishing I wasn’t pregnant. Trent left me. I started doing drugs. Lost my job.
And it was one of those horrible pregnant dreams where everything is more realistic than life itself. I finally woke up, sweaty and crying. And Trent was snoring next to me. And it took about 5 minutes before I realized I was still pregnant. I reached down and felt my belly and couldn’t feel her moving, and just knew something was wrong.
Then, she rolled over. And gave me a swift kick in the gut. And I have never felt such relief and joy in my whole life.
I guess I really do want this baby. More than anything in the world.
Two name suggestions from my mother, who told me this while drinking a vodka and cranberry. She also told me about the woman she gave a ride from the park, who apparently smelled like alcohol and had no shoes.
“Mom, she was probably homeless! You can’t just go around picking up homeless people.”
“Shit, Megan, it’s not like I told her where I lived!”
Jesus.
http://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.png00Meganhttp://www.crazybananas.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Crazy_Banans_Logo_WebsiteBanner.pngMegan2006-03-14 20:09:192006-03-14 20:09:19Marney or Hemmingway?
Tale of the Non-Geek
/0 Comments/in Blond /by MeganI know, there’s always an excuse, but this time I really do have a problem. Besides my normal problems. My computer officially thinks it is Sunday, January 11, 1970. Now, I think this is strange for several reasons. Number one, I was not alive in 1970. Number two, this website obviously did not exist in 1970. And number three, this computer did not exist in 1970. There is a possiblity that my computer is having a mid-life crisis and is trying to pretend it is a spry young laptop. Maybe some sort of anxiety now that the new Mac’s have come out making my dear Macaroni look like an old hag…
Whatever the reason, this strange series of events along with the fact that I’m in my third trimester now, which makes me unable to do about anything except for eat and sleep and bitch, I haven’t been updating as much as I should. Part of it is also that I don’t feel like I have much to say. Ahhh, the life of a human incubator. I was looking back at some older posts and realized I am much funnier when I have drunk stories to tell. I think I’m one of those people that isn’t to fun whist sober.
To appease you [that is assuming people are still visiting this site] here is a link to a retro post about my pre-baby life. I actually wasn’t that exciting then, either.
Oh yeah, and the Bearded Wonder turned off comments because of spammers. Sorry. They’ll be turned back on as soon as we can.
Nightmares
/0 Comments/in Pregnancy /by MeganSaturday night I had the most horrible, awful dream of all time. I think that part of it had to do with the fact that I went out to a bar last night in an attempt to “hang out” with a bunch of Trent’s guy friends and their significant others. For the first time in a long time, I almost wished I wasn’t pregnant. I was just so damn tired of feeling huge and hideous and boring. I felt how bitchy I was acting and just wished I could have a good time. I saw the girls dancing to the not-so-great band, just laughing and getting completely smashed.
Sucking down jacks and cokes quicker than I could down my sprite.
Then, last night, I had a dream that I lost the baby. And everything fell apart. I thought it was my fault for wishing I wasn’t pregnant. Trent left me. I started doing drugs. Lost my job.
And it was one of those horrible pregnant dreams where everything is more realistic than life itself. I finally woke up, sweaty and crying. And Trent was snoring next to me. And it took about 5 minutes before I realized I was still pregnant. I reached down and felt my belly and couldn’t feel her moving, and just knew something was wrong.
Then, she rolled over. And gave me a swift kick in the gut. And I have never felt such relief and joy in my whole life.
I guess I really do want this baby. More than anything in the world.
Marney or Hemmingway?
/0 Comments/in Family /by MeganTwo name suggestions from my mother, who told me this while drinking a vodka and cranberry. She also told me about the woman she gave a ride from the park, who apparently smelled like alcohol and had no shoes.
“Mom, she was probably homeless! You can’t just go around picking up homeless people.”
“Shit, Megan, it’s not like I told her where I lived!”
Jesus.