Crazybananas

Happy Halloween from Darth Vader, the pink Carebear with the rainbow on its tummy and the guy who’s too cool to dress up!

(Is it strange that some guy in my office dressed up as Princess Leia? I think we may have gender issues. And power issues.)

Nobama vs. McRage, 2008. Are you ready?

And no, I’m not talking about the big day next Tuesday, I’m talking about a blog post that will BLOW. YOUR. MIND. Next Monday, we will debut a post almost one month in the making, when Abbie (conservative, Sarah Palin loving lady) and Megan (me, the liberal one, quite possibly a socialist….don’t tell) will participate in the ultimate blogging throwdown. Abbie will be writing as her alter-ego Barack “Nobama” while Megan will star as John “McRage” McCain. Let’s get ready to RUUUMMMMBBBBBLLLLEEEE!!!!!!

In all honesty, the idea to do this post came from all the negative energy that has been directed to both of Abbie and myself because of our political beliefs. And, although we’re both very serious about this election, we decided we needed some laughs. Abbie will be writing from Obama’s point of view, and I’ll be writing from McCain’s….should be interesting.

So, in preparation for this ultimate blogging champtionship, here is some information about the writers. Choose sides wisely, people.

Abbie (aka Nobama) is a young mother living in Alabama, though she isn’t Southern. Somehow, despite the fact she’s from one of the reddest states in the Nation and now lives in the South, all of her friends are left wing liberals. And we’ve all been pondering how the heck that happened ever since the first debate of the election season last winter. Abbie knows how to drive a stick shift, and has choreographed dance routines for Britney Spears. Not really, but she has done a mean dance rendition of Spears’ hit, Toxic, at several drinking establishments in her hometown of Manhattan, Kansas. Abbie is a lifetime conservative and has a Sarah Palin button on her Facebook page. She is a big fan of Fox News, and she may have an unnatural crush on Shepherd Smith. Abbie loves cheesebread, the Kansas State Wildcats and rap music circa 1999.

Megan (aka McRage) is the author of this here website. If you’re reading this, then you probably know who she is, but here’s a little bio anyway, as she is a bit vain and likes to talk about herself. Megan lives in the suburbs of Kansas City and is very excited to be voting in a swing state this election. She’s a liberal, hipster, asshole according to most friends and co-workers. Though she is 26-years-old, she is regularly mistaken for 13, as she can be found most Friday nights either a.) Reading the Twilight series, b.) Reading Harry Potter, c.) Watching made for TV Disney movies or d.) All of the above. Megan was a Hilary supporter until this summer, when she realized she had no chance and moved on to support Obama. She likes the liberal media because they usually agree with her. Megan enjoys long walks on the beach, Justin Timberlake and Diet Dr. Pepper.

Be sure to tune in next Monday for the Ultimate Blogging Throwdown!

A few months back I wrote this list of 100 Things I want to do in my lifetime. It was an exercise inspired by Maggie Mason, who said creating this type of list has changed her life in dramatic ways. Well, my life has dramatically changed, for sure, but most of the things I’ve crossed of my list have happened by chance. Here’s what I’ve done since writing the list last Spring:

2. Purchase my own house - DONE - October 2008

31. Turn off my phone for a day - DONE - August 2008, Family Reunion in Steamboat Springs, Colorado

45. Attend a political rally - DONE - October 2008, Barack Obama “Change We Need Rally” in Kansas City

46. Donate to charity anonymously - DONE - October 2008, but I can’t tell you who or that ruins it!

47. Drink wine in Central Park - DONE - May 2008, Theresa’s Wedding

50. Reconnect with an old friend - DONE - June 2008, name removed to protect the friendly

88. Make enough money to support my family - DONE - March 2008

92. Drink a fancy cocktail on the roof of an apartment building in NYC - DONE (sort of, close enough, technically not an “apartment” building) - May 2008, Theresa’s Wedding

94. Go for a week without checking email - DONE - August 2008, Peters Family Reunion

At this rate, I’ll have all one hundred things completed by the time I’m eighty! But still, I’m proud I crossed anything off this list. What have you done in the last few months that you’ve always wanted to do?

Yesterday I was at the drugstore purchasing some much needed pharmacuetical accessories, when I decided to pick up a tube of lip color. Okay, I know it seems like I’ve been talking about make-up a bit more than normal lately (especially since I don’t believe I ever wrote about make-up before last week), but this is going somewhere. I needed something that will stay on all day, as I hate touching up my makeup and HAAAATTTTTEEE leaving lipstick/gloss stains on a glass when I’m out with a client. Blech.

I purchased this stuff, which was recommended to me via Mighty Goods. I went back and forth on what color to get, as I’m a bit of a pansy and I don’t believe I’ve ever worn red lipstick in my life. I’m all about chapstick and clear gloss, but it’s Fall and I painted my kitchen orange and I’m feeling risky, so I bought a color called Wine. It’s super red, like Gwen Stefani red or Christina Aguilera red. Red.

I put it on this morning while Lu sat beside me in the bathroom, attempting to secretly eat her tube of kids’ toothpaste. When Trent heard her yelling after I refused to let her eat said toothpaste, he came in to see what all the fuss was about. He looked at me, cocked his head to the side and said, “That lipstick is way too dark.”

Ouch, that one stung a bit at six o’clock in the morning. And I thought it looked so cute!

He followed that up with, “I mean, you look like the Joker. The latest one. The one that died.”

Charmed, I’m sure.

So, I’m leaving it up to you, dear readers. Is this too red? Scary? A bit like an evil comic book villian?

And yes, I do realize I need a haircut. But other than that, I’m probably the best candidate for America’s Next Top Model. I am just so darn gorgeous! And modest.

We’re driving down the highway after a long day spent cleaning out our old residence. It’s just Lu and I, myself covered in splotches of floor cleaner and smudges of dirt dotting my forehead. I can see Lucy in the rearview mirror, sucking her thumb and twirling a strand of hair around her finger. Her eyes are sleepy. She’s just come from her Aunt Mikayla and Uncle Heath’s house, where she napped through our cleaning marathon. In an attempt to get her into the car quickly, I just scooped her out of the make-shift bed and into her carseat, sans pants or shoes. The 30 minute drive to our new home is boring for her, I can tell.

I turn on the radio and start checking the dial for anything but a commerical for hair removal surgery (seriously, are people in Kansas City that hairy?). I turn to a mix station and hear a familiar beat. I crank up the volume and start bopping around in my seat. George Michael’s voice booms through the speakers, telling me that I gotta have faith. I peek in my rearview mirror and see Lu’s face light up. She starts bouncing around to the beat. We both are singing along.

“I gotta have faithafaithafaith-ahhhh!”

This is why I love my kid. She’s unequivocally the most awesome person in the world.

Try not to sing along, I double dare you.