Crazybananas

No baby, and no scheduled induction until next Wednesday. If you’re calling my phone it is off because I literally can’t deal with having to tell yet another person that she’s not here and probably won’t be here for another week.

After last year’s gardening experience I had pretty much given up on trying to grow any sort of plant inside or outside of my house. There are so many naturally occuring weeds in our yard, who really wants to add more plant life?! But, of course, since Lucy seems to be intent on driving my ass up the wall, and I’ve started my maternity leave, I figured, why not try again?

Now, I’m sure you’re probably thinking, “how sweet, she’s nesting!” To you, I’d like to say, “KISS MY BUTT!” (I would say ass, but I’m going to be a mother). It’s not that I have an overwhelming urge to bake and cook and plant flowers, I JUST HAVE NOTHING TO DO AND I’M SO DAMN BORED!!!

Anyway, now we have the broading wild beast gaurding the back porch, hopefully keeping the squirrels and other rascals that ate the 2005 flowers away. Let’s hope she doesn’t try to jump off the deck into the tree. That’s just what we need, a Rottweiler sitting in an oak tree, stalking squirrels.

Stubborn girl. Grrr…

OK, now I’m starting to get a little pissy…for the past three weeks I’ve been sitting around, waiting for this little girl to make her first appearance. She has had the wonderful intention of making everyone happy (she gets that from me) and has waited to be born until after some people’s final exams, some people’s graduations, weddings, business trips and high school reunions. Either she really wants to make sure that everyone who may want to be present will be there, or she is just taking a really warm nap (she gets that from Trent). I can just see her now, sleeping soundly, almost starting to wake up and then she thinks, “nah, it’s just so warm in here. I think I’ll stay for a while.”

And to top it all off those damn celebrity babies are popping out all over the place. Not only did they steal my pregnancy thunder, now they’re beating me to the punch. How am I supposed to make millions on the first (very anticipated) photos of my baby when Shiloh and Kingston are taking all of the attention?! I wonder if I’m going to hear a nice speach from my mother on how nice those names are and how they don’t at all sound Mexican?

I’d just like to bring to everyone’s attention that when Taylor Hicks won American Idol, there were tears throughout the auditorium. You could see tears of sadness and joy on both Katherine, Taylor and their families. But most of all you could see the tears streaming down the face

of

David

Hasselhoff.

That’s what I call glorious television.