Crazybananas

My daughter ran off with our American flag the other day, letting it drag all over the ground and get covered in dirt. I think that may be illegal.

Today I purchased a large floppy hat by justifying a vacation I might get to take (maybe) in August. Yes, a large hat. That is floppy.

I make fun of my mom for her QVC addition, but I can see how easy it can be to get in over your head. Online shopping is the devil.

My first kiss was so lovely and romantic, I hate remembering that it was with a total 13-year-old douchebag.

I sometimes wonder if I actually want more kids, or if we should just stay the happy little family we are now. Three is the magic number, or so they say.

Lately I have felt so uninspired, I haven’t wanted to write a word on this blog, knowing it would all come out negative. I’m afraid I might be all out of stories.

I have a very creative friend that wants to start a business with me. The thought of it gets me so excited, but then I remember that this family already owns a business and two entrepreneurs in one marriage could very well equal a crowd. But I can’t help wondering “what if?”

Here’s to the end of another week. May your weekend be filled with refreshing pools, baking in the sun, Michael Jackson tribute mixes, the smell of SPF 50, fresh fruit and lemonade. Happy summer!

Photo via NYC + KC. By me.

Hi there, it’s me! Yes, me! I’m here, on the blog, writing something! Amazing, isn’t it!

I feel like I owe everyone an explanation to where I’ve been and why I haven’t been writing as much as I normally do. But then I remember that only three people read this thing anyway, and you all know me well enough to know when I need space, I will certainly take it.

And really, that’s it. There has been so much going on in my offline world, that I haven’t had the time to sit down and document it like I enjoy doing. Both good and bad.

So I figured, in a grumply fashion, I’d write about not writing. Because when I do that, it usually leads to more writing. Because I’m certifiably insane.

And now I’m off to brave the 105 degree weather with 80 percent humidity, by taking Lu to the pool. Maybe I’ll Tweet about it. Maybe I’ll take a daily photo. Maybe I’ll even post a song . But I probably won’t write about it here.

For now.

This might be my favorite picture of the Professor. Poor Molly Moo gets dumped on more and more now that we’re in suburbia (a walk? damn, dog, just poop in the backyard!), but we still adore her. Even though she insists on sleeping right next to my side of the bed and tripping me every morning.

Just wait for this Halloween…I suspect the entire family may dress up as characters from Star Wars…after all, I totally have the Darth Vadar mask and Molly would be the perfect Yoda. Now I just need to convince Trent to wear a gold bikini, and we’re set!

I pride myself on being relatively organized. I like my space clean and simple, not too much junk cluttering my home or office. When things are cluttered I don’t think straight, I can’t focus, and I tend to get a bit crabby (just ask the husband, who is, of course, the most cluttered being on this planet). So today when I spent 10 minutes in downtown KC digging for my keys in my purse, I decided it should immediately be de-cluttered. And holy cow, I carry way to much crap in my purse! I am amazed I don’t have a hernia from lugging this stuff around all day. For example, in my purse right now (along with my keys):

- Small Shinzi Kateh notebook
- Note from Trent asking me to pick up food for dinner
- Lucy’s report card from school
- iPhone (with headphones)
- Package of tissues
- Wallet
- Business cards for work
- A check stub from a work event I attended last week
- Two Kashi cereal bars (mostly smushed from being in my purse)
- One tube of bright red MAC lipstick
- One tube of neutral Lancome lipstick
- One tube of Burt’s Bees lip gloss
- One compact of MAC foundation
- One travel sized bottle of Japanese Cherry Blossom body spray
- One travel sized package of baby wipes
- Two pens
- One bottle of Fekkai dry shampoo
- One iPod Touch (belonging to my mother-in-law)

And seriously, that is way to much crap. Especially considering how often I use some of it (read: never). So I’m de-cluttering. And I have a feeling my shoulders will thank me.

This year, for her birthday, Lulu got a digital camera. I know, she’s spoiled rotten. But my mom and dad wanted to get her something nice and they gave me $100 to do it. And trust me, that kid was not getting a scooter. Unfortunately, Lu’s inherited my balance problems. So instead I got her this Vtech digital camera in PINK! (via a recommendation from Nicole) and she’s been following me around snapping pictures of everything in sight since. Yesterday I cleaned off her memory card and after only five days with the thing, she’d taken over 200 pictures (and one video?). Granted, many of them were of the floor or someone’s shoe, but there were a couple shots in there that weren’t half bad.

Classic “Mama’s Mad” shot. It think I was telling her to put the camera down and go to bed. I look very stern, no?

Lu got a couple of princess crowns for her birthday, and they have been good subjects for her camera. There are also several pictures of me dancing around with the crowns on, but luckily Lu cut my head off in most of them.

This is Lu taking a picture of me taking a picture. Click here to see my final product.

This is what most of her people shots look like. If they’re not headless, they’re definitely eye-less.

Along with the crowns, she also got a pair of fancy dress up shoes. She keeps trying to cram them on my giant feet, and I’ve never felt more like the ugly stepsister. Except when I could hear the shoes breaking underneath me. Then I felt more like Shrek.

You can see an entire set of Lu’s photography (I think I’ll call it, Lutography) here. Beware, most of the people pictured are missing their heads. You’ve been warned.

I know, it’s been nothing but pictures and links lately, but I HAD to post this, I’m contractually obligated.

Yes, that is Zack Morris on the Late Show. The real Zack Morris. And he even does a song from the most amazing band of the early 90’s, the Zack Attack. Awesomeness.

1. Crushed ice
2. My new, comfy, grey jeans, bought from Anthro with my gift card (thanks, Mikayla!)
3. The yoga app on my iPhone
4. The Rosebuds song, Another Way In (and actually, the entire album, Life Like)
5. Framed Lucy art hanging on the walls
6. The sky last night
7. This movie preview (and no, it’s not Twilight-related)
8. This quote: “Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect, it means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”
9. This photo:

Dear Lucy,

Today you turn three years old. I know, I don’t believe it either. How could we have gone from this…

to this…

…in only three years. It’s insane. I truly believe I may just be dreaming and I will wake up in our old house in the West Plaza covered in spit up at any moment.

I struggled to write this letter, Lulu, mostly because there is just so much to say, and no words will ever be enough. This is the first year you’ve been really excited for your birthday and you understand what is about to happen. “I get presents! And pink flowers! And pink balloons! And a pink pinata!” In fact, I think our house may look like it’s been covered in a thin layer of Pepto Bismol considering all the pink that will permeating every nook and cranny. You love pink, it’s your favorite color (besides green and red and black and did I know that black in Spanish is negro? Why yes I did, Lu, thanks) and you will not allow anyone else to say it is their favorite color as well. When someone dares to say, “You like pink? I like pink too,” you will quickly and sternly correct them that pink is YOUR favorite, not theirs. My little Lu, a dictator in the making.

Other than your love of pink and dancing and baby dolls, you are mostly a tomboy. You love soccer, and are the youngest kid in your soccer class at school. I debated on whether you were too young to be already playing a sport, but you love it and since it’s during school it doesn’t seem to wear you out like I thought it would. Your favorite friends at school are boys, particularly one little dude who tells people you are his girlfriend. You just smile and laugh and tell him “Nah, I’m not your girlfriend, you’re my BEST FRIEND.” Then I go in a corner and cry because you just told me yesterday that I was your best friend, but I was quickly replaced by the three year old boy with the big brown eyes.

But truly, you do tell me I’m your best friend on an almost daily basis, and even though you now tell everyone that, I will never forget that you told me first. And each time you do, I thank my lucky stars that my kid loves me so very much. Then you usually ask for a “huggie” which means you will squeeze me until your arms hurt. Seriously, little dude, huggies are the best.

Lulu, we’ve been through a lot in the last year. The biggest change was our move from the city to the suburbs, something you handled way better than I did. I mourned the loss of an old life, old friends, our old house, but you were more excited about the new than the loss of the old. You loved your NEW ROOM, NEW SCHOOL, NEW FRIENDS, and that excitement is what got me past my sad phase and in to my happy place, where spending a Saturday afternoon at the Home Depot doesn’t make me want to vomit. You love the Home Depot, and when you play pretend at the park like you’re driving someplace, you always say you’re going to the Home Depot and then to Dora’s birthday party. Sounds like a nice little Saturday.

Oh, kiddo, you are the best thing on this planet. I don’t know what else to say. The person you have become is so charming, so hilarious, so fun, you are everything I always wanted to be as a kid. You are cooler than I was at twenty-three years old, let alone three. You are the most wonderful combination of your father and myself, a true nerd with no qualms about telling the world what’s what. I know that someday, probably sooner than I want, you’ll be influenced by your friends, your peers, to be something you’re not, and I want you to know that who you are, right now, is the most fantastic person. Your light shines brighter than you will ever realize, and your pride in who you are is one of my favorite qualities. You think you’re the coolest, and you’re totally right.

Thank you for singing me songs when you think I’m sad and for dancing with me in our empty living room. Thank you for liking good music and for asking me to turn the radio up whenever you hear a song you know I like. Thank you for running up to me at the end of a long school day screaming “Mommymommymommy! That’s my MOMMY!” and then hugging my legs tightly. Thank you for storming off in a huff with your arms crossed saying “You’re not listening to my words” when you’re mad, as it cracks me up.

When you were an infant, and wouldn’t nurse even if you were starving, I made up a song for you using the letters of your name. For some reason, though I have no singing voice and the words are totally lame, whenever you heard this song, you’d calm down, eat and drift off to sleep. Lately, you’ve begun to sing this song all by yourself, and though it may be the dorkiest song in the universe, when you sing it, I feel my heart jump. You’ve been listening. This whole time, when I thought what I was saying or doing didn’t really matter, it turns out, it did. I am molding this gorgeous little girl in to a real live person, and so far, so good.

Love always,
Mama

Have you all met Miss Carly, my sister’s new puppy?

I almost snuck her into my purse and took her home with me, but them my sister told me how she threw up in their car, so I decided I’ll just make weekly visits instead.